Spiritual warfare & intercessory prayer are special gifts given to a chosen few who are called to be warriors in the army of the Lord Jesus Christ. People who are called to be intercessory prayer warriors go through battles that are sometimes very personal to them, but every battle affects them deeply no matter the circumstances. We fight for our loved ones & ourselves. But when these battles are over & things get quiet we, like physical soldiers, can’t come back to “normal” life. We are stuck in battle mode & become tired, angry and frustrated when we can’t bring things back to what the world calls “normal”. We don’t fit in where we used to fit. We don’t feel right around worldly people and situations. We hate sin & evil with a stronger passion than most. Yet when the battle is not raging we oft times seek to fill the void & try to quiet the war cries of battle that rage in our minds with worldly past times (TV, shopping, internet, etc) to ease the pain, shock & devastation of battle or as the world call it, the PTSD of battle. Physical soldiers never fit back into their “old life” & often get frustrated with themselves because they don’t fit & they spend the rest of their lives trying to find that rush of battle & they are always on high alert because that is who they are now. This puts stress on their bodies, minds and emotions which sometimes cause them to “act out” of sorts because the least little thing triggers something in them that takes their minds back to the battle & they don’t know how to cope with it so they lash out or isolate themselves to avoid the pain of rejection. They feel unfulfilled because they are not walking in the full calling of who they are NOW, not who they used to be, and they can never be that person they used to be again because they are forever changed by the battle or role they were called to and walked in for however long. They become frustrated with themselves and life in general because they are misunderstood and they just don’t “fit in”... This is what the world calls PTSD. The same thing happens to intercessory prayer warriors. We wake up in the middle of the night with the power of God all over us & know it’s time to pray (go to battle). As we yield to the call of the Holy Ghost and begin to pray He takes over & when He is finished the urge to pray lifts just as quickly as it came & we are left feeling excited & full from the battle but when it is done we find it hard to fit in. We find it hard to walk our “normal” walk of daily life (job, kids, shopping, cleaning, etc.) Nothing fulfills us like the white, hot fire of the Holy Ghost flowing through us and we seek after that fire all the time therefore we don’t “fit” in “normal” life. Our conversation is different, our outlook is different, our hearts & minds are different. WE are transformed into HIS image and His likeness more and more with each battle & experience he brings us to and through. Just sitting on the pew being a good little Pentecostal will not fill that void. Things of the world don’t fill the void & when we are not in the battle or in the presence of our King we constantly long for it and often become frustrated when we can’t reach that level of His presence that we want. We are different. We are called out. A peculiar people chosen for God’s purpose to hold a position in His army & we don’t “fit” in this world anymore. We only “fit” in the spot He has called us to fill. Sometimes the trauma of the battle and the fact that we try to fit where we don’t belong can cause us to feel frustrated much like physical soldiers. We get angry, frustrated, feel pain & anxiety. The enemy constantly speaks to us telling us we are different and no one likes us. They attacks never stop in our minds because the enemy tries to shut down & destroy the fight in us. In other words when we are not walking in our full calling as warriors we suffer from spiritual PTSD. The world rejects us because they don’t understand us, and worse than that, sometimes other church people reject us because they don’t understand the depth of what we seek and say things like “it don’t take all that.” Or “oh, she is just emotional or showing out to be seen.” But they don’t understand that once you have been in the presence of God and become yoked with him in the midst of battle you long for that closeness and will do whatever it takes to get there again. We are forever changed and will not be able to feel true satisfaction as just a good saint and this puts stress on our bodies, minds and emotions which sometimes cause us to “act out” of sorts because the least little thing triggers something in us that takes their minds back to the battle & we don’t know how to cope with it so we lash out. We feel unfulfilled because we are not walking in the full calling of what we are NOW, not who we used to be, and we can never be that person we used to be again because we are forever changed by the battle or role we are called to and walked in for however long we are allowed to walk in it. Just like physical soldiers never fit back in their “old lives” because they were called to a higher calling of battle & often suffer from PTSD, we as prayer warriors don’t fit in our “old lives” because we are called to a higher calling. And when we try to force ourselves to fit into a spot we no longer belong in it causes trauma & a post-traumatic stress disorder reaction.