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Wives:

Just like there are secret places in God that we can safely run and hide, there should be a

secret place within you that your spouse can safely run and hide. If our marriages are compared to the relationship between Jesus and the Bride of Christ (the church) then we should be a safe place for our spouse. Ladies, the Word says in Proverbs 31:10-12 , "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good not evil all the days of her life." Proverbs 18:22 “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.” Prov. 12:4 says: “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones. We are called as women of God and wives of our own husbands to be a safe place for our husbands. His heart should safely trust in us. He should be able to tell us anything and know that we will take it to the Lord in prayer which is the only place we should be taking anything our spouse tells us or trusts us with. There should never be a time that anyone can walk up to your husband and repeat a secret that he has hidden safely in you. Not even your closet girl friend or prayer partner should know your husband's secrets. Our husbands should be able to walk away from us in the morning knowing that during our busy day He is our main priority after the agenda of God in our lives. He should be able to walk out of our homes with confidence knowing that when he returns we will be waiting with delicious anticipation of his return. He should come home to a warm, safe place found only in us. This is only possible through our actions and our words showing him that he can safely trust in our love and devotion to him. We should be an extension of God's hands, arms and love unto our husbands. He should be able to feel the Love of Christ in each word & deed from us. It would be almost impossible to estimate the value of a Christ-like husband in a home. If you have one, you had better treasure your priceless jewel while you can and not wait until you are sobbing with regret. If he doesn't provide income quite as fast as you would like, but he prays at your table every day, you are a very rich woman! If your husband attends worship and walks humbly before the Lord with you, you are truly rich. A home can operate without a Christ-like husband and even produce children who become faithful Christians, but how much better off the home is with a Christian husband as its head, provider, protector and guide. We as women have our role in this. We should be about our business and at all times honor our husbands so he can safely take his place in not only our lives but in the calling that God has on his life. Proverbs 31 gives specific instructions as to what we are to do with our daily lives and how we are to walk as wives. In all these things our husbands should be able to trust that he is safe in us. Proverbs 31:23 says “her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.” this was a place of honor. Then in Prov 31:31 “Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.” We are to bring honor to our husbands. He sits in the place of honor in the gates… and our works are to be praised in the gates. We should allow our fruits to be praised and never bring a reproach to our husbands. No matter where he goes he should never have to worry about what he will hear about us. We should ensure that he feels safe in what we are doing when he is not there, no matter where he goes. Just as Sarah honored Abraham by calling him lord, we should bring honor to our husbands in the same manner. We should allow our good works to bring honor not only to our Lord and savior Jesus Christ but unto our husbands as well as he is an extension of the hands of Christ reaching towards us. We are one flesh with our husbands and therefore if we dishonor him we dishonor ourselves. He should be able to walk in

confidence in knowing that his wife is an up right woman and has his best interest at heart at all times. Being a wife is a ministry within it self. Our homes should be our first mission field. Our husbands should be the first soul to reach and show forth the Love of Christ to.

Husbands:

Ephesians 5:23 says: "For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the savior of the body." A true Christ-like husband should be the leader without being a dictator. He is to be the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. Jesus is not an uncaring tyrant over the church. He is the Savior, protector, and supporter of His precious bride! This is the way every wise Christ-like husband properly leads in the home. He leads by love, understanding, and example. The more a husband learns to do this, the better leader he will be. The entire family will gladly and willingly follow his leadership and obey his directives, with very few exceptions. On the other hand, when a husband continually forces his wife to do his will Not God's will, or follow his whims and fancies; he denies her the privilege of making her own choice. This is not biblical, practical, or even humane. In Genesis 2:23 we read: "And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." The very fact that woman was taken out of man suggests that holy matrimony should be the closest union and the most affectionate attachment on earth. A husband should always consider and treat his wife as though she were part of him. This motivates him to always nourish and cherish her, just as he does his own flesh. The wife should be able to feel safe at all times in the presence of her husband and even when He is not there she should be able to feel safe that He has her best interest at heart and will protect what they have in every circumstance, at all times. This is a choice the husband must make. Only His actions and words can ensure that his wife feels secure in Him. Husbands your wife should be able to walk next to you with confidence that you are her safe place. There should never be a moment of doubt given to her by your word nor deed. She should be your main priority after your commitment to God. She is flesh of your flesh and bone of your bone and should be considered in every action you take or decision you make whether she is there with you or not. You should be a safe haven for each other. If a husband and wife really become one as the Bible teaches them to do, there marriage will become sweeter and more fulfilling each year. "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it [her]" (Eph. 5:25). The key to being a Christian husband and loving your wife is loving her as Christ loved the church. Jesus loved the church with a self-forgetting and self-sacrificing love, even unto death. This is the way Christian men should love their wives. "So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself" (Eph. 5:28). If a man cares about his own body, he will love, cherish, and protect his wife because they are "one flesh." Instead of hating their wives, they should nourish and cherish them as Christ does the church. In this passage, the word "nurture" means to care for one's own flesh. Because we have become one flesh with our mate, husbands should care for her to the best of our ability and rejoice that they have the opportunity to do so! The word "cherish" actually means to keep warm, like a bird protecting her young with her wings, shielding them from the chilled winter air. A Christian husband keeps his wife warm and comfortable with tender, loving care. How lovely she will find her nest when she receives this kind of care. The only thing that does not have needs is something dead. Rejoice and thank God every day that you have a living, breathing woman who has needs and, by the grace and strength which God gives you, you are able to minister to those needs! This is not a burden, but a rich blessing from God, and all the time you are ministering in a beautiful way to yourself! The Bible says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing” [Prov. 18:22]. “Rejoice with the wife of your youth” [Prov. 5:18]. Are You a Considerate Husband? In 1 Peter 3:7 we read: "Likewise, you husbands, dwell with them [your wives] according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered." To dwell with your wife according to knowledge you must do some studying! Study your beloved and find out what she really does need. What makes her happy? What makes her nervous? What makes her relaxed? What makes her depressed? A Christ-like husband considers his wife very precious and gives her the honor that she is due. We always honor, protect, and cherish that which we consider precious, if we are wise. If your sweetheart is precious to you, don't hesitate or neglect to give her the honor that she deserves and craves. The husband should always consider the fact that his wife is physically weaker than he is and treat her accordingly. At least, this is the way it is supposed to work. Many women are not frail weaklings in any sense of the word, but generally speaking, they are weaker physically than men. A Christian husband always considers his wife to be a fellow heir of the grace of life, or life eternal. This makes the relationship so much more meaningful than it would otherwise be.

BOTH:

Genesis 2:23: "And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." Being fellow heirs, both husband and wife have the same shining goal in life (Heaven). Everything they say and do should be directed toward reaching this worthy goal. Life may be like a roller coaster with its joys and sorrows, but there is still hope, strength, and peace when both husband and wife know where they are going. Nothing can keep them from reaching their mutual goal except their own unwise choice to be unfaithful and disobedient. This common goal adds a dimension to the marriage that enriches it, enables it and expands it. There must be a more intimate connection between a husband and his wife than exists between parents and children. When this is not true, and for one reason or another, the husband does not leave father and mother, and cleave unto his wife, there is always friction and problems because God's will is not being obeyed and His word is not being honored. Husbands, when you leave father and mother and cleave unto your wife, you do not abandon your parents or any of the rest of your family. Certainly not! You are simply putting your wife first, above all other human beings, because this is what God tells you to do. forsaking all others...

Blessings from the desk of:

~*Sister Soldier*~

2014

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